ok so my mums friend has had her snake for over 8 years and has treated it as a child, it slept next to her and everything. the snake started acting differently and started to sleep straight instead of curled up, she thought something was wrong so she took it to the vet and the vet had to send someone to collect the snake because the snake was sizing himself up to her BECAUSE HE WAS PLANNING ON EATING HER THE NEXT DAY
I like how sweden just decided one day that gender is fucking bullshit so they got a gender neutral pronoun and stopped separating boy clothes and girl clothes and have pictures of spiderman pushing a baby stroller in a toy magazine why isn’t every country like sweden
you push that stroller sassy spiderman!
you fight those bad guys girlfriend!
you style that hair lil’ dude!
1 universe, 9 planets, 7 seas, 7 continents, 809 islands, 204 countries, and I had the unfortunate luck of meeting u
THERE ARE 8 PLANETS, YOU UNCULTURED SWINE.
VIVA LA PLUTO FUCK YOU
I’m pretty sure “Viva la Pluto fuck you” is the best sentence I’ve heard all week.
sexual orientation: finnick when he’s drinking water out of the spile for the first time
I’m so fucking weird
I’m the nicest rude person you’ll ever meet.
I don’t give a fuck about anything but at the same time, I care about a lot.
I hate people but I develop crushes easily.
I hate myself but I’m completely fabulous.
I need help.
this is the most accurate thing I’ve ever read.
*Googles big word before I fuck around and use it injudiciously*